Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Cruise Control

by chinwhat at 9:45 p.m.
I know the hate on Tommy Cruise has been on for a minute now, but I like the guy. MI was on the other night, and I liked it. I liked Top Gun and Risky Business. Enjoyed Rain Man and Jerry McGuire. But really, what tops this:

Since Scientology, in the popular imagination, is such a loaded word -- often associated with heavy-handed recruitment tactics, strong-arm-lawyer assaults and steep membership and course fees -- one would think that Cruise wouldn't be so willing to take a journalist through that world.

"Who are those people that say those things?" Cruise asks when I bring it up over lunch one day. "Because I promise you, it isn't everybody. But I look at those people and I say, 'Bring it. I'm a Scientologist, man. What do you want to know?' I don't mind answering questions."

He lists some of Scientology's selling points: its drug-abuse, prison-rehabilitation and education programs. "Some people, well, if they don't like Scientology, well, then, fuck you." He rises from the table. "Really." He points an angry finger at the imaginary enemy. "Fuck you." His face reddens. "Period."

(btw, this picture is really funny if you view it in FireFox. It's animated extra fast! Laugh x1,000,000)

Sunday, July 17, 2005

"Look at him... He loves it!" Pt. 2

by chinwhat at 4:11 p.m.
Okay, so Dave C plays World of Warcraft (allegedly) which reminded me of a story I heard of Curt Shilling playing EverQuest. I was sent a link to an interview he did in 2K1 and his EverQuest gaming. Even though I have no idea what they’re talking about, I find it EXTREMELY funny! My favorite part:

Q: I have to ask about the Glanville incident. Doug Glanville of the Phillies hit two home runs off you in your first game against the Phillies since the trade to give you your only loss so far this season. He said it was revenge against you for leaving his poor dwarven paladin Bingbong to die at the hands of some aviaks. So who made the bad pull? And what is your side of the story? Here�s your chance to set the record straight.

A: C'mon dude, you ever hear of a cleric pulling in a group with a Paladin? It's like I always say in baseball, don't make excuses because people that know the game know the real reasons why you win or lose. Same with EQ man. Anyone with a lick of sense in EQ could see right through his babbling and know that he was the train conductor in that entire episode. Doug�s the goods though. Fun as hell to group with. His ranger is around 30 now. Nahir is his name. Give him a tell if you want a fun guy to group with. He experiments with other characters a lot more than I do though.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Accent e"Gah?"

by chinwhat at 10:42 p.m.
This past weekend, my cousin’s cousins came up to visit. They’re from Michigan. They have that funny mid-west accent. Yknow, the one where they say their ‘ohs’ as a long ‘ows.’ So instead of “so-rry” it’s “saaaaaaary.” They really stress the “a’s” and “i’s” as in “Eyyye saah thaht movie.” I asked them, what our (from Canada) accents were like. They said it was “Canadian” but we don’t have that “aboot” thing going on which is cool, because I find that stereotype pretty ghetto. Now this is the part that messed me up: I asked them if our accents were the same as NY/LA tv accents. “Is it like on ‘Friends’ or something?” and they said it wasn’t. What!? I talk different from people on tv!?! Messed up right? … So Monday came and I was talking to a new employee from work. Random chit-chat. I asked her where she used to work: it was some random Xpharma company. I told her I never heard of it before and then she asked me “are you new to Canada?” WTF?! I went home that night with a major case of BP (brown paranoia) “Do I speak with an accent?” I kept repeating random words to myself to see if they came out ‘normal’ Today I asked what she meant by that comment. Reassured, she said: “Xpharma is a big company and I was surprised you never heard of it before”

Monday, July 11, 2005

B+ for C Lounge

by chinwhat at 10:16 p.m.
Went to CLounge on Friday night to celebrate my uncle Alan Houston’s big 34th. I knew that Shaun and Chris went there, so I asked them how it was. Shaun said it was “alright” which got confirmation from Chris. So I wasn’t really expecting much. No expectations, no disappointments… and boy, there sure wasn’t! What I noticed first waiting in line was 1) the number of browns in line (as mentioned by Shaun) and 2) the number of females who were there for a bachlorette party. After getting in free (WAR guest list), the first thing me and my sister did was hit the patio. (In ai architecture vernacular:) It was beautiful! Dark stained wood deck. Nice pool in the middle. Great lines. Soft beds and chairs for lounging. Wonderful weather. What else could you want in a patio?! Drinks were $6 but it’s a price I can accept due to the “high classness” of it all. In fact, my sister made an amusing observation: “You can tell it’s a high class place when they don’t pat you down” laugh, such ghettoness! Anyways, after it got a bit chilly, we alls went inside. The next big observation that hit me was that the guy to girl ratio was an easy one to one! I’ve never been to a club/lounge where I’ve seen that! Nice mixed crowd, lots of Chinese girls. Unisex washroom was nice too! My only real beef was the pure shittyness of the “DJ.” Come on dog, you’re 1) not mixing/blending the songs, 2) letting them play waaaaaaaaay to long, 3) have a wack set list! The personification of wackness! Other than that, I endorse this joint.

Oh, and if I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a dozen times: I love dancing next to white people. Ya’lls ain’t helping the stereotype!

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Corporate Slug?

by chinwhat at 9:37 p.m.
So there was a generic email sent out at work about a month ago. It was for the social club’s annual golf event. “Pack dat shet!” I thought to myself. I mean, GOLF? Who am I? Shaun? So I send that crappy message to the delete bin. A week or so later, a co worker asks if I’m going. “Psh! No! Why?” “Because it’s fun!” Fun, eh...??? I do a little searching. Asking folks in the know, and a lot of people agree that it’s THE event of the year. So for my $45, I get a lunch (or is it dinner?) a fleece pullover and a round of golf. But allegedly, there’s hardcore “prizes” which are really "gifts" from our clients. Allegedly, the crappiest gifts are $100 gift certificates. So in theory, I’m earning a cool $55 in spendable vouchers… allegedly…

So I mosey on down to HR to pay the fee. Get antics already as I circled “XXL” for the size of my fleece sweater on the sign up form. NinaHR says in a surprised tone “DO YOU KNOW HOW LARGE THAT IS!?!?” me: “uh, extra extra large?” She continued to try and talk me out of getting it. Geez, it's not like the extra fabric’s coming out of her paycheck or something! Easy! She even went so far as to pull one out and show it to me: “Look how big it is!” displaying it in front of me. “Do you want to at least try it on?” “Uhm, nah, I think it’s good” To which she inappropriately (in an HR way) said: “You’re such a guy” Oh punk!

All I need to do now is step my golf game up. I don’t mind embarrassing myself in front of all the big wigs at work, but still, I gotta represent! I’m already trying to come up with witty things to say as I hack at the ball. “I.T. WHAT!” or “Tiger Woods ain’t got shit on me!” (© Denzel Washington). I know I’m going to try and pop my collar and do that fist pump that Tiger does, but I realize my game really sucks (yeah, that one too!) I’ll need to hit the driving range a few more times before the event in August... oy! FORE!!!

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

"Am I what?"

by chinwhat at 9:05 p.m.
walking with coworker down hall way today...
coworker: "What's your background?"
me: "What do you think?"
coworker: "Are you mexican?"
me: ?!? "(laugh) Do I look mexican?"
coworker: "well, i knew a guy who had the same complexion"
me: "(laugh) well, some people ask if i'm chinese"
coworker (she's chinese): "no way!"
me: "yup, someone who works here!"
coworker: "really?"
me: "yup"

laugh, so i look ten years younger AND look mexican... laugh...

Monday, July 04, 2005

Musically Insane

by chinwhat at 9:01 p.m.
Q: How much music do you have on your computer?
A: 22 gigs of audio, 5 gigs of videos

Lately, I find that I download way more than I listen. I can literally go through my collection and find hours of music I can experience for the first time… and to me, that’s fucked up! It’s like a fat guy ordering more than he can eat. And he’s already fat! American consumption pig right here! Or is this different? I mean, music is art, right? And you can never O.D. on art can you? And I’m sure I’m not the only one. I don’t know how much you might have, but I DO know that you have music that you don’t listen to on your computer (probably). How much you pushing?

And by the by, there’s a bunch of concerts I’d love to see, not limited to these:

Mos Def & Medina Green - June 23, 2005 Harbourfrontcentre $35 (whoops)

Little Brother & Justus League - June 26, 2005 The Reverb $24.50 (whoops)

Stones Throw Tour Featuring Madlib, MED, Peanut Butter Wolf, and J Rocc - June 29, 2005 The Opera House $???? (whoops)

Platinum Pied Pipers And Jean Grae - July 8, 2005 Harbourfrontcentre $Free!!!!!!!! >GASP<

K-OS & John Legend - July 15, 2005 Molson Amphitheatre $32.50

Common W/ DL Incognito - July 26, 2005 Kool Haus $35.75

Erykah Badu, Jill Scott, Queen Latifah, and Floetry - July 27, 2005 Air Canada Centre $60+ (Let’s BOHO!)

Marc Ecko Tour - August 13-14, 2005 The Docks $59.41-167.50 (Gat DAMN!!!)