There’s A New Brown In Town!
by chinwhat at 2:24 p.m.
Yes, it is true. Another fair maiden has captured the eyes of yours truly! Who you ask? Global News Morning’s traffic goddess: Pooja Handa. (That picture at the bottom does NOT do her justice!) But the real question is: How does she stack up against BT’s weather specialist Ms. Nalini? Well, have no fear. I’ll break it down.
The shows: I seriously cannot watch Global’s morning show. It’s straight up hot garbage! I swear, the hosts are talking pieces of card board! I hate to call anything ‘vanilla’ because I like vanilla. But yo, this show is VANILLA! Can their crappy banter be any more… well, crappier? Avoid watching at all costs – except to check out the traffic segment which coincidently happens to come on right when Nalini is doing her weather report. As for BT, well, they’ve fallen off a bit. But I still find it pretty entertaining. Kevin's not rocking the suspenders anymore and they got Trish Stratus co-hosting on friday, so that shouldn't suck to much.
Visuals used: I’ve always liked CityTV’s weather graphics. They keep their game tight. But on Global’s end: they’re using this ultra wack HD touch screen, or something. Honestly, the colour scheme and map looks like it was created with MS Paint. They’re using cool technology, but the graphics and design are terrible!
Now for PH versus NS
Name: Well, we know who wins this one. “Nalini” sounds hot. Sounds exotic and sexy. “Pooja?” uh….
Gift of Gab: Sometimes, like, Nalini sounds, like, to “valley girl” ish, yknow? This one goes to Handa. Vocabulary skill, she’s ill!
Fashion: Because Global’s trying to run the “we’re professional” angle, Pooja’s stuck in her suits. They’re nice once in a while, but on the daily? Let her show off what she’s got! Meanwhile Nalini’s on some stylin’ and profilin’ sh1t! Although Sharma might have some fashion misses, she’s got more hits! Great hats, nice scarfs, tight baby tees et al.
Attitude: Sharma’s seems to be on some high maintenance tip. Low key for me! Vote: Pooja.
Skin: Don't get me wrong, Nalini looks good with her light skin complexion, but P’s melanin enhanced tone, owns! WAR Darkies!
Hair: I’d call this as a draw. Handa’ has the right style - straight hair split down the middle and its the right length. Think of Terri Hatcher in her “Lois & Clark” days. But Ms. Nalini has the right colour! Licorice black with that healthy looking shiny sheen, seen?
Face: Also a draw. Nalini’s cuter than Pooja, but Pooja’s got a bigger mouth & smile. As an exchange in a James Bond movie goes:
Unrealistic possibility of hooking up (I mean, if she wasn’t she, and me wasn’t me): We all know Nalini’s expecting and married to some guy with funny hair, so that’s off limits. As for Pooja? Well, she's rocking a rock of rockin' proportions (the size of a small rock!) Bling Blang Blaow! Access: denied!
The winner: Well, since I have a close and personal relationship with my good friend Nalini (laugh) the nod goes to her. But P's a more than ample subsitute when Ms. S is gone on mat leave.
Brown in the new black: Chin
The shows: I seriously cannot watch Global’s morning show. It’s straight up hot garbage! I swear, the hosts are talking pieces of card board! I hate to call anything ‘vanilla’ because I like vanilla. But yo, this show is VANILLA! Can their crappy banter be any more… well, crappier? Avoid watching at all costs – except to check out the traffic segment which coincidently happens to come on right when Nalini is doing her weather report. As for BT, well, they’ve fallen off a bit. But I still find it pretty entertaining. Kevin's not rocking the suspenders anymore and they got Trish Stratus co-hosting on friday, so that shouldn't suck to much.
Visuals used: I’ve always liked CityTV’s weather graphics. They keep their game tight. But on Global’s end: they’re using this ultra wack HD touch screen, or something. Honestly, the colour scheme and map looks like it was created with MS Paint. They’re using cool technology, but the graphics and design are terrible!
Now for PH versus NS
Name: Well, we know who wins this one. “Nalini” sounds hot. Sounds exotic and sexy. “Pooja?” uh….
Gift of Gab: Sometimes, like, Nalini sounds, like, to “valley girl” ish, yknow? This one goes to Handa. Vocabulary skill, she’s ill!
Fashion: Because Global’s trying to run the “we’re professional” angle, Pooja’s stuck in her suits. They’re nice once in a while, but on the daily? Let her show off what she’s got! Meanwhile Nalini’s on some stylin’ and profilin’ sh1t! Although Sharma might have some fashion misses, she’s got more hits! Great hats, nice scarfs, tight baby tees et al.
Attitude: Sharma’s seems to be on some high maintenance tip. Low key for me! Vote: Pooja.
Skin: Don't get me wrong, Nalini looks good with her light skin complexion, but P’s melanin enhanced tone, owns! WAR Darkies!
Hair: I’d call this as a draw. Handa’ has the right style - straight hair split down the middle and its the right length. Think of Terri Hatcher in her “Lois & Clark” days. But Ms. Nalini has the right colour! Licorice black with that healthy looking shiny sheen, seen?
Face: Also a draw. Nalini’s cuter than Pooja, but Pooja’s got a bigger mouth & smile. As an exchange in a James Bond movie goes:
Bond: “You're one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen.”
Girl: “Thank you, but I think my mouth is too big.”
Bond: “No, it's the right size…for me, that is.”
Unrealistic possibility of hooking up (I mean, if she wasn’t she, and me wasn’t me): We all know Nalini’s expecting and married to some guy with funny hair, so that’s off limits. As for Pooja? Well, she's rocking a rock of rockin' proportions (the size of a small rock!) Bling Blang Blaow! Access: denied!
The winner: Well, since I have a close and personal relationship with my good friend Nalini (laugh) the nod goes to her. But P's a more than ample subsitute when Ms. S is gone on mat leave.
Brown in the new black: Chin
3 Comments:
Damn Chin you have wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy too much time on your hands buddy but I really love your breakdown of brown vs brown! Excellent commentary, breakdown and analysis. I'm proud to say that you are a true "geek" and yeah Handa vs Sharma is a great cat fight indeed! For some reason I'm not feeling either of them. If you want to check out a smart brown look for Monita Rajpaul on CNN World or what not she used to be on City TV before but now has moved down to Atlanta so yeah she gets my thumbs up! She has beauty and brains unlike these two!
TING TING Round 2 ******
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Wow! I remember her! So that's where she is. Damn, that's pretty hard core! At first I thought you were talking about Rudi Bakhtiar (http://edition.cnn.com/CNN/anchors_reporters/bakhtiar.rudi.html) from cnn headline news who i dont like at all. to white washed.
Yknow who was really good? Monica Deol from Eleectric Circus (google searches)
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