Stalk Quotes
by chinwhat at 10:03 p.m.
(these events took place a couple of weeks ago. i just had this on the shelf for a minute...)
So Shaun has a "friend" at the gym that we like to call "Stalker" (behind his back of course. Have you ever mocked a stalker in his face? No! You know why? Cuz they'd eff you up! That's why!) And why is he Shaun’s “friend?” Well, when Shaun does squats, Stalker likes to stare at his loins when Shaun bends down! (laugh) He’s some guy whos pushing 220lbs I’d say. Taller than I. Slurred lispy accent. Looks Arabic maybe. Never able to get rid of that 5 o’clock shadow he seems to always have… Anyways, here's one exchange between us and the stalker last week:
Stalker's on the stretching chair and I’m walking by to get a drink of water from the fountain. Now I’m trying to be a not-mean guy and I give him the “yo, what’s up” head nod right?
Stalker: Hi
Me: Hey
Stalker: Hey, have you seen Daredevil?
(I don’t even slow down to converse…)
Me: Naw, I ain’t seen that sh1t!
I walk by and get that drink and back to what I’m doing. Except, I realize that I *MAY* have said that in a mean tone. I didn’t want to come off like that, but *meh* what am I gonna do, right? So a little later on, Shaun and I are doing some leg exercises, talking, minding our business… And Stalker is watching, with his arms crossed, Shaun do his leg extensions. Not sure who asked about the movie Daredevil first, Shaun or Stalker, but I blurt out: “What the fu(k you askin’ bout Daredevil for!?”* Whoops! Another “I’m angry” tone. I figure I’d keep my yapper shut. So Stalker was just interested in stalking Elektra, Jennifer Garner’s character. “I wanted to know if Elektra was Daredevil’s aide.” Wow, that's great. So from now on, we don’t just call him Stalker, but Daredevil as well.
*okay, I didn't really cuss. I just added the eff word for emphasis on the tone of my voice at the time. :P
So Shaun has a "friend" at the gym that we like to call "Stalker" (behind his back of course. Have you ever mocked a stalker in his face? No! You know why? Cuz they'd eff you up! That's why!) And why is he Shaun’s “friend?” Well, when Shaun does squats, Stalker likes to stare at his loins when Shaun bends down! (laugh) He’s some guy whos pushing 220lbs I’d say. Taller than I. Slurred lispy accent. Looks Arabic maybe. Never able to get rid of that 5 o’clock shadow he seems to always have… Anyways, here's one exchange between us and the stalker last week:
Stalker's on the stretching chair and I’m walking by to get a drink of water from the fountain. Now I’m trying to be a not-mean guy and I give him the “yo, what’s up” head nod right?
Stalker: Hi
Me: Hey
Stalker: Hey, have you seen Daredevil?
(I don’t even slow down to converse…)
Me: Naw, I ain’t seen that sh1t!
I walk by and get that drink and back to what I’m doing. Except, I realize that I *MAY* have said that in a mean tone. I didn’t want to come off like that, but *meh* what am I gonna do, right? So a little later on, Shaun and I are doing some leg exercises, talking, minding our business… And Stalker is watching, with his arms crossed, Shaun do his leg extensions. Not sure who asked about the movie Daredevil first, Shaun or Stalker, but I blurt out: “What the fu(k you askin’ bout Daredevil for!?”* Whoops! Another “I’m angry” tone. I figure I’d keep my yapper shut. So Stalker was just interested in stalking Elektra, Jennifer Garner’s character. “I wanted to know if Elektra was Daredevil’s aide.” Wow, that's great. So from now on, we don’t just call him Stalker, but Daredevil as well.
*okay, I didn't really cuss. I just added the eff word for emphasis on the tone of my voice at the time. :P
3 Comments:
Now who's stalking who? :P
Daredevil's stalking us. Trust us, he's stalking us!
Ahh cool is this guy the same as the guy that stalks Shaun in his neighbourhood?
Humm do you see the trend here that guys like Shaun! WOW that's nuts hehe
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